It bothers me that no matter how much you change, people will still always have the same perspective of you because of what you did a year ago. I hate it. I can be a completely different person, but no one will ever change their mind. I can scream and try to sort things out to make everything better and try to prove that I am different now- that this is who I really am (not who I was for that short window of time)- but the veiw I’ve impressed on certain people will never change. I’ll always “be” that person- even though I’m clearly NOT. But what people don’t understand is that I hate that person, and I’ve always hated that person.
I wish people could see me for who I am now, and like me because I had enough guts to actually leave my mask behind. But no. That’s not the way things work. I will forever and always be the person I hate. The person I lothe with all my being. I thought we were all past the grudges. I thought things could go back to normal. Isn’t that what they have always taught us? Forgivness?
I guess that’s why they taught us moving on too. To cancel the forginess thing out just in case it didn’t work out.
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